ever-fleeting storm
From Monopole [formerly Theodorus in Excelsis]
An ever-fleeting storm dissipates beyond the deep horizon. She is best when she is less than serious, when she smiles like she did when she was just a girl. There it is. An honest smile. She looks back at me and is quickly to the water. Lime-green bikini disappears into the shallow of the sea. Will catch her. Sand wet now; more wet now than sand. Water at my knees. She swims. Know nothing other than her. Will catch her. However it has come to be, she here with me now, I do not care. What only matters is that she is here, and here with me.
Almost no sound. Quietness save for my thoughts and quick breathing, and the rolling surf. Consumes me, the sea, consuming her. Her skin in the water, water against mine. How soft the sea. Breathing deeper now. Could it be she that much better a swimmer than me? Knew that; must’ve. Hear her celebration, she to the rock before I. Had that been to what we were swimming? Racing were we? She’s beaten me. Tread to try to see her so victorious. Hold the water for a while; keep it still. Keep it there till through the sun you see her. Hold the water; sun in eyes; can’t see her; shade your eyes. There she is. Lime-green bikini.
Hold the water. Please be still the moment.
How in love with her I was. Imagine this exists.
Teddy returns. Still sitting up in his bed.
Where is it that I now exist, he thinks to himself. Hadn’t I already been that? How had I been there again? And where now has it gone? The illusion that you had been there just to remember the moment, but to not actually exist in it?
What pain!
